By: Elyane Youssef
“If I ever loved a
woman, the more I loved her, the more I wanted to hurt her. Frida was only the
most obvious victim of this disgusting trait.” ~ Diego Rivera
I know you love
her.
If you didn’t, you
wouldn’t be with her. But since you’re only a human being with variable
emotions, you might be inclined to love her in all the wrong ways.
A healthy, happy
relationship can transform into a destructive one if you treat her less than
how she deserves to be treated.
Nonetheless, I
hope you try to love her right. I hope you cast every ray of awareness upon
your love for her. I hope you know that awareness is what keeps a relationship
strong.
I want you to
remember how she looked when you first laid eyes on her. She was everything you
longed for. Be it her beauty, her wild nature, her sense of humor or her
independence, there’s something about her you haven’t found in anyone else.
And what floored
you the most was her completeness.
If you love her,
keep her this way. Keep her beautiful, keep her wild, keep her complete.
While she’s the
master of her own fate, I wish you understood that you play a major role in her
life. How you treat her determines how she views herself—you can make her shine
or make her feel lost. She’s a statue in your hands and she only hopes to be
held with vigilance.
If you love her,
don’t destroy her.
Know that she was
destroyed before and another destruction isn’t what she’s aiming for. If she’s
with you, know that she has stepped over her fear and insecurities to be with
you. She has stepped over her past and decided to give love another chance. She
has entrusted you with the health of this relationship—and with her heart.
Don’t let her
down.
You destroy her
the moment you think you know her. She’s not a book you will eventually finish.
She’s something yet to be discovered—so live every day as if you’re meeting her
for the first time.
Be present.
Nothing destroys her more than your emotional absence. You can sit with her all
day long and not really be there, yet you can be so far away and be completely
present.
Stimulate her
thoughts, her emotions, her being. Dive into her soul like you’d dive into an
ocean.
Know that you’ll
wreck her if she ever felt you need her rather than want her. You’ll destroy
every inch of her if you only love her when loneliness creeps up on you.
Because she seeks your love in all moments, not just when your fears and
insecurities strike.
I know that your
own past sufferings may have destroyed you. But don’t love her just so she can
carry your emotional baggage with you. Don’t love her if you only want her to
fix you. Know that she will, with time, without you even knowing.
Her love and
existence will heal every part of you. But if you are with her solely to fill
the emptiness inside you, she will know—and it will destroy her.
And remember, she
doesn’t want to be fixed either. Maybe she opened up to you and told you about
her painful past. Perhaps you know the exact number of pieces she was turned
into. But she didn’t tell you so you would fix her—she only told you so you can
know what she endured and how it made her who she is today.
She wants you to
acknowledge that your actions toward her—actions motivated by love,
understanding and patience—are what matter.
Don’t treat her
like a broken woman. She is complete with all her pieces, even though they may
still be scattered everywhere. Embrace them with her—just don’t add to them.
Make her see why she went through destructive relationships in the past. Make
her realize that she went through the “worst” so she could appreciate the
“better” that you are.
If you love her,
love her with all her flaws and insecurities. She is as imperfect as you are
and she only hopes to share that imperfection with you. She wants to undress
her soul in front of you and be utterly herself.
She wants to be
the same way with you that she is in the mirror—crazy, wild and free. If you’re
not ready to accept her as she is, you will destroy her.
If you love her, build
her up because she will be doing the same for you. Know that whatever effort
you put in, she will be putting in double.
If you show her
the moon, she’ll show you the entire galaxy.
If you take her to
a well, she’ll introduce you to the ocean.
If you treat her
right, she’ll love you more.
If you love her well, she’ll never
forget you.
